I like to think of myself as a fairly positive person. I’d say ninety nine percent of the time anyway. Okay maybe eighty percent! Like everyone, things get me down from time to time. I overthink, worry and dwell on stuff far too much. Especially on people that definitely don’t deserve my precious time!
But on the whole, I’m pretty good at knowing how to turn things around, get myself out of a bad mood and end up seeing life in a much more positive light. If you have been struggling a bit recently with feeling a bit sorry for yourself, are already fed up of the nights getting darker earlier and are growling at everyone who crosses your path. Or just want to focus on changing your mindset a bit, here are my top tips for living a more positive life:
Say goodbye to negative people
This might sound obvious but it’s so needed in order to help shape a more positive life for yourself. Life is so short, why are you spending it with people that don’t make you happy? Now we all have them, that ‘friend’ or person we know that doesn’t stop moaning about everything (and anything). They drag you down with them, you don’t need it. Life is hard and serious enough as it is sometimes. Only surround yourself with people that truly make you happy. You want people that lift you up, support you in everything you do but equally will tell you if you’re being an idiot. I have made a pact to only surround myself with positive influences and it’s made such a difference to my life.
In complete contrast to the point above, when you do have people that are really special in your life and I am very lucky to have a handful of people I just couldn’t live without, you need to feel grateful for them. And I mean really feel grateful. Take some time out to just sit and think about all of the people that mean the most to you. Make a physical list if that helps. Think about why each of them are so important and what they bring to your life and how fortunate you are to have them. When I first read ‘The Secret by Rhonda Byrne’ a few years ago, one of the tasks in there is to make a list of everyone and everything you’re grateful for. You do this every night before you go to bed and this made such a big difference to my life at a time when I really needed it. When you spend time to focus on the positives, the negatives don’t seem so bad after all.
Are you having a bad day? Something or someone has really wound you up and made you want to cancel everything and go back to bed? Well you need to distract yourself. It’s absolutely key for turning your bad day around. My favourite way of doing this is simply taking a break. Go outside, go for a walk and get some fresh air. Or go and grab a coffee, phone a friend and have a big moan or just stop whatever you’re currently doing and simply do something else! Whatever floats your boat in that moment – within reason, obviously! Just stop trying to ‘plough on’ and be okay, it won’t work. Everyone can spare ten minutes to just have a break and change focus. You can thank me afterwards.
Do more of what you love
Do you ever feel like life is just too busy to actually achieve anything? You know what I mean, getting up and going to work, coming home and doing housework / the dinner / watching a bit of telly – if you’re lucky, and then it’s time for bed. Or you may have kids to get ready and look after on top of that or even a job that means you get home with just enough time to have a quick bite before bed calls and then you’re back up again to do it all over. We all have routines in our lives in one way or another and it can sometimes be hard to find time for things you really enjoy. Well guess what, you need to make time! Playing a sport, taking time out for your hobbies, spending time with dear friends and family. Whatever it is that you love doing, set some time aside to make sure you do it every week. Even for a hour. Make sure you’re week isn’t just all work and chores. Or make sure you really love the things you are doing in your spare time and do more of them.
Have that bit of cake!
I’ve had a pretty negative relationship with food since I can remember. I regularly talk about the struggle in my YouTube vlogs.
I’m a serial Yo-Yo dieter and have tried every diet in the book; Weight Watchers, Slimming World, juice diets, calorie counting, no Carbs, low Carbs, carbs only before midday… Blah, blah, blah, it’s exhausting. And what for? To feel miserable most of the time because you have only lost a pound that week or worse still, have put on five pounds, despite only eating lettuce and dust! I’m so over it. Yes I do still have weight I want to lose, but instead of focusing on number crunching, I am going to focus on being healthy and happy, moving more and feeling good. And if now and again that means I want that bit of cake or I want to devour a whole pizza to myself, then so be it. I won’t feel guilty for it, I will just eat less the next day to balance it out! Easier said than done I know…
Even if you don’t have any food struggles like me, but you do find comfort in that odd bit of cake but always talk yourself out of it, just have it! One slice of cake won’t kill you. And trust me, taking the feeling of something being ‘off limits’ out of the equation, will make you a damn sight happier!
So they are my top tips for living a happier, more positive life. Let me know in the comments below what you think and what you do to make your days that little bit more enjoyable.
If you really are struggling though, and can’t get yourself out of it in the usual ways, don’t be afraid to ask for help. I wrote a post here about struggling with me own mental health Issues, and ended up having therapy which was the best decision I’ve ever made and I truly believe, saved my life.
It’s okay to not be okay and never struggle alone.